Learn and Remember, Part 1

Lately, I have been challenged to remember what I learned while dating and apply it to other relationships. To help us both, here are some of those lessons.

Relax and have fun.

For those of us who tend to be task-oriented, focused, and intense, it can be difficult to relax and enjoy ourselves, even while doing something calming like taking a walk in a park or eating a great dinner. Being this intense all the time can drain you and the people you are spending time with. Remember to take a deep breath, relax and enjoy the moment.

Be honest and up front, communicate openly.

Once, my sister and I ordered some burgers for takeout. Because of a recent bad experience, she wanted to make sure both burgers were cooked all the way through, which required cutting both burgers in half. Though I had been looking forward to the experience of eating a full, round burger, I didn’t say anything. I cut my burger in half…and had a serious attitude eating my sliced burger. The whole thing took the joy out of our outing.

Instead, I should have told her that I did not want to cut my burger in half, and was willing to risk it not being done to enjoy the burger properly. Turns out the burger was cooked well-done, and it would have been perfect had I articulated what I truly wanted.

Communicate your thoughts, feelings and concerns. We can’t move past issues if we are unaware of them or don’t talk about them, and talking about them helps us avoid bitterness.

Run to Jesus first.

No matter what happens or who comes into your life, Jesus is the most important person. There were times when something big happened and I wanted to take the problem to my boyfriend first, then my family, and other friends, and Jesus got pushed down the list. But when I sought God’s help first, everything else fell into place.

Seek Jesus, serve Him, follow Him, and He will certainly guide through this journey called life.

Life Lesson: Learn from your experiences. Relax, communicate, and run to Jesus first.

Friends – There for a Reason

I didn’t realize how much I needed my old friends, and how much they needed me.

The close friends I made in undergrad, living on campus for 3.5 years, physically spread out right after graduation. A few went overseas. I had one go to China, another to Australia, another to the Middle East. Others moved to other states—Maryland, Alaska, Connecticut.

We did not keep up very well. I talked to one every five months or so. It was pretty bad.

Around the same time that the coronavirus broke loose in the US, I realized that I needed more friends, and began reaching out to some of those friends from college. Turns out we really needed each other. I remember one particularly lonely day. I called my old roommate, and we talked for five hours—‘twas a fantastic conversation.

Over the summer, I met up with another friend once who I hadn’t talked to in at least two years. When we met up, we realized we had gone through similar experiences, and were able to swap stories and tips. We became devotional accountability partners, which has helped us both.

Life can be tough, and we need our friends to laugh with us, listen to us vent, talk with us for hours, remind us that we are loved, and tell us how great we are. I thank God that He has answered my prayer for friends. In reaching out to the old friends, I realized I have more than I realized, and by His grace I am keeping up with them more often than ever, and am better for it. Praise God for my friends!

Life Lesson: Keep up with your friends. You need them, and they need you.